I Think We're Damned
by sbu-liz
Summary: Now AU and slightly darabbleish. Basically a not so typical Robin and Raven fic. Raven pushes him away, but he keeps coming back, all while he still sees Starfire.
1. Chapter 1

Hello all. First Teen Titan ficcy for me. It was written on the sly too, god knows how much I'd get razzed if someone knew I was writing a RobxRae. But, as I'd like to point out, this is no ordinary Robin and Raven fan fiction. All I see are these lovey dovey fics, and while I do enjoy them to the fullest extent, I don't really see any that I can wrap my feelings around. So, as you might have guessed, personal experience sucks, but I'm going to write this, even if it kills me. I think I have another one in the works as I type, damn!

I don't own TT. Dude, I really don't want to. All of the rabid fans, the people pushing for new story lines, gaw, I could massacre a good many owning it.

Chapter One: Not of the Flocking Kind

Marked skin made the move from left to right, or from right to wrong. Red wasn't the color here, and green didn't shine as much as he remembered. Deep violet shrouded his emotions, covered him. Lilac scent enveloped his mind, so strong he could taste it.

All the while, amethyst averted itself away from and to the lovely water beneath. Anxiety bloomed fresh, a bird being caged for too long would stave itself to leave. She longed to leap, embrace smothering her unlike anything she had felt before.

Pleading, no begging him to go somewhere the dark could be outdone. Go to her, she urged, and shock was evident on his face. This was for the best, a better half deserved better, better than her, and right onto Starfire.

This was what would kill her, the small sessions of confidence between the two birds, two of a kind, he had claimed. Raven wasn't of the flocking kind. She'd be happier in her room, subject pushed into the deepest pit of despair in Nevermore. She'd let him know this, in an attempt to push him away. It had worked, and now she would gaze upon him and his light.

This made her feel sick. Seeing Starfire and Robin together made her physically ill, but it was for the good of the team, making it better for him. She'd stick to locking herself in the bathroom every time they went on a date, or every time they held hands, or every time they talked to each other.

Cold ceramic felt like an oasis to her fever stricken cheeks. Shiver and shake, sweat and freeze. Why was Azar cursing her with this? She felt empty and full at the same time, alone but crowded, and all but ready to give in.

This was gong to put her in her grave. This relationship going on behind closed doors. Being there but being here at the same time. With him but not his.

I'm not sure if anyone caught my meaning, that Raven and Robin were still together, but that he and Starfire were publicly with each other. So, Robin's a two timer. Heh, who would have thought? I would have. Now, reviews are appreciated, but you may flame me. Flames are a good source of cheap energy, right up there with the hugs I'm hoarding.


	2. Chapter Two: You Want Weird?

Meh, it's become a semi-drabble that's horribly AU, out of character, and dark. Why do I write this way? . I'm getting increasingly mad at myself. Anywho, because I adore reviews, I must thank the people who were nice enough to do so.

**The Komodo Dragon Phoenix: **Well, I'm glad you like. I was so worried about it! And I have continued! The next one might not be here for a while though, what with school about to start and all. Thanks.

**KhmerGurl1113: **Reading on is what keeps us authors alive I guess. Thanks.

**A Dead Hero: **Yes, the title drew you in, did it not? I was thinking of this fic and trying to come up with something that wasn't played out when I remembered what a friend of mine had told me about an old relationship of mine. Happened to make enough sense for you to like it. Thanks.

**Nightlark: **My first torchblower flame! Huzzahs are in order! (weak huzzah from the crowd of people behind her) Well, you know how it goes. I got a hug too! Another one toward taking over Dark Fantasy. (rubs hands together evilly) Thanks a bunch.

Don't own TT. I had to sell most of my self esteem just to buy the Trigun DVD set.

X-X

_If I could trust you, I'd be a better person. But if you gave me a reason to trust, you'd be my hero. Let me give in then take away what I've known. You say I still mean something, but what?_

_You know what I think? I think you want the best of both worlds. Bring your misery to me and your joy to Starfire. I could bring up a thousand reasons why I'm better off without you, but I can't bring myself to leave. _

_Robin, I think this is it. I think we're damned._

Half lidded eyes regarded a drawn up figure of a girl once strong. Why bother trying to comfort her? She'd only push away again, and that would sting more than remark she'd thrown at him.

With a deep intake of breath, Raven collected herself, eyes once again devoid of the pain she felt, and it unsettled him. More than ever he wanted to pull her close, hold her and whisper more fake apologies.

She sat on the edge of the bed, back to him now, and searched her nightstand for something.

"Raven," Robin spoke with a hard tone to her, like she was a child who had misbehaved. She turned on him, hair disheveled and mussed, vision narrowed to a point of staring beyond him. It made something in him break.

Pulling a small slip of paper out, she began to scribble words onto it. A few hiragana could be made out as she brushed past him and handed the note to a waiting doorman with a few instructions. As she walked back past him, he caught her wrist, forcing her to look at him.

"What was that?" blue eyes were boring into her.

Raven managed a spiteful smirk, "Inspiration strikes at the strangest times. Hari-Kiri just made another million off of 'us'." she pulled the sheets closer to her. "Go back to BrightFire, Boy Blunder. You did your job, now go make that band of hers happy." Raven wrenched her arm out of his hold and gave him a small push as she headed to her bathroom.

X-X

_sbu-liz's essential lyrics to understanding this chapter: Seether's Plastic Man_

_"Why don't you let me be, and I'll pretend I'm well. But you're too blind to see, and I'm too tired to tell. And in your apathy, your head begins to swim. Another tragedy, but you're too cold to feel."_

Well, it turned into this. Sort of AU, no? How do you like? Review, flame, or just plain bitch about it. I could care less, just make that review count go up.


	3. Chapter 3: Loss of Sight

Ah, I don't really remember who reviewed, but thank you. I do remember someone saying they were short...uh, not being rude or anything, but that's what drabbles are; short looks into situations. The only Reason I write like this is because I think like this. Too short? Don't read.

I don't own the Teen Titans. Hell, I don't even officially own a car.

They weren't seeing eye to masked eye.

Conclusion came to to Raven after months of meditating on her and Robin's 'delicate' relationship.

And while he would usually be down her throat about something, her was currently on a date, with everyone's favorite, naive, Tamaraenian, Starfire.

Rave didn't hate Starfire. It wasn't fair to her, to be mad and upset with her just because Robin couldn't let his head and not his other organs decide what was best.

Just what was best?

Best would be a disemboweled bird, red breast considerably redder, hanging by his shirt collar grasped in the talons of a double eyed girl.

Rage couldn't help herself. It wasn't every day she was allowed to put such thoughts into Raven's mind. She cackled in grim glee when she wasn't chained up and locked away. Her vermilion cloak flapped wildly in the wind of Nevermore. Freedom was something she liked.

One thing that emotion and Raven had in common was that they both enjoyed their freedom. It was just that one could handle the thought and the other would go on rampages.

Both decided not to say which reaction belonged to who.

It was Rage who had offered to beat Happy and Love into a pulp. Timid had fainted in fear, Intelligence throughly ignored them with her nose buried in a book, and Lazy had fallen asleep in the middle of the potential battle field.

Courage was the one who stepped in and snapped Raven back to reality. To Robin knocking on her door, to actually thinking of greeting him rather than killing him.

Damn Courage to the coldest part of Hell. She wanted to be angry with him, to let him see what he made her feel.

And slowly, ever so slowly, Rejection, a newcomer to the bunch silenced them all. The new emotion, clad in a rather dark maroon, surfaced when Robin and Starfire fell through her door in a heap, both blushing furiously, like they were still thirteen year olds on their first date.

On Raven's floor, in her room, lay the root of all her problems. The root she wasn't willing to blame.

Not until he looked her right in the eye, and didn't see anything.

Well, it's considerably longer, if only to get my point across and because it's late and my brain is really working over time.

I'm really sorry it took so long. It's been since September that I've updated, and I am a horrible person.

But flattering myself helps nothing.

Review, flame, cry, scream, pull out your hair. Don't care. Just say something.


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Whoa! Anyone else notice how all of my updates coincide with school breaks? No? Well, um, keep not noticing, okay?

Can anyone here forgive me if I add a bit of humor to this story? I'm talking Douglas Adams type humor, you know, serious and witty, slightly British? Ah, well, they won't be too out of character. Speaking of, I was reading over and I realized how much I villonized Robin, and I'm like, "Holy hell! Robin's supposed to be chivalry incarnate!" But if he's trying to please both Raven and Star, is that chivalrous? Just a screwed up kind of chivalrous I suppose...Too many years of getting whacked against walls by a shonen ai question mark like Slade'll do that to you.

Ah, anywho, back to the story! I'll thank everyone at the end... (It's like showing the good things last..makes you sit through the really bad chapter if only to see your name in text. XD)

I don't own the Teen Titans. If I did, I wouldn't be trying to stretch sixty dollars far enough to afford the Eureka SeveN special edition box set, Constantine on DVD, and Lostmagik for my DS. It's impossible! Just like ever owning the Titans is!

-X-

Did they always have to end every fight with "I hate you!"?

Raven's answer was a very shaky yes. It kept things safe and at a distance (if only for a few days) but it also twisted at her stomach unlike even the worst types of flu. It was the only thing that put a buffer between them after Starfire flew the coop. Where she flew, no one knows, but everyone's surmised that it had something to do with witnessing a brutal attempt to snuff out the life of her beloved Robin, at the hands of an angry, crazed...bunny. Yes, Starfire swore she saw a rabbit, a very viscous one it would seem, and because Robin couldn't manage to remember a thing, that's the story everyone was happy with.

Only Raven knows the truth. The truth is that she had been breeding demon rodents for years, she thought dryly, and that one had finally gotten lose. Either that, or she's the one who is guilty. Lies are good, which is why "I hate you" worked just fine for her.

The Boy Blunder, on the other green gloved hand, could do with a simple "Get out!" or "Just move!". Hate was too strong a word, and the only word he meant in that statement was _I. _Running a hand through his springy hair, he sighed heavily, he wished he had either a decent sized cup of coffee, or a horse pill of a sedative. Wow, from one extreme to the other. The sad thing was that it didn't bother Robin he was thinking that way. He either wanted to be wide awake or so deep in sleep he didn't dream, couldn't dream about her and the argument that had conspired only hours ago.

Everything was hunky dory in Raven's room, Robin kept at bay for a short while, getting absorbed in a good book, forcing yourself to forget about what you felt; It was a real party in there! The sentence she had started on an hour ago had been read at least a hundred times now, never really sticking in her brain. Oh well! Who cared! I hate you, you hate me! Alls right with the world and God has his place in Heaven, for Christ's sake. Routines. Worked. Well. That's all that mattered.

That, and the fact that Raven was beginning to forgive Robin. That, and how Starfire wasn't there. That, and how everyone remaining in Titan's Tower though bother birds had finally acquired the feather brains they had worked so hard for.

Yeah, only four reasons for whatever she had been counting reasons for.

She sighed, unknowingly mimicking the action Robin had done only minutes ago. Everything wasn't simple, they just pretended it was, and that was good enough. Tiring, but it worked and everyone was happy. Everyone except them.

Perfect. You had to love it when plans came together.

-X-

Sigh, time to thank..all three of ya. Somehow, I can't blame you.

**NightLark**: Well, it got there, I guess. Do you still like it! Please say yes! It'll make my month if you do!

**Arielkid78**: Sappy happy has been on my list of favorites lately. I just couldn't write angst today...But I really wanted to update...

**RavenRogue19**: Well, you're seeing. Question is, do you believe?


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